Time Out: Bloggers are people, not machines

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I’ve thought long and hard about whether or not to post this and when I should post it, and I finally decided that before I could move on with the new tips and recipes I have in the queue, I had to address this. I know I’m not the only blogger who has had to deal with this sort of backlash from readers, and it’s time one of us speaks out.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve received some pretty mean, insensitive and downright rude comments and emails from readers who are not happy that I haven’t been posting as often as I used to. Believe me, no one is more unhappy about not being able to post on a regular basis than I am. This has been my pet project for over four years now, and to not have the time or ability to maintain it the way I used to doesn’t sit well with me. I love writing and sharing my knowledge with everyone; to have to put everything on hold blog-wise pisses me off like nothing else.

But there are reasons why I haven’t been able to post with the frequency that I used to – real, difficult, legitimate reasons that have prevented me from having the time or energy to write, photograph, promote, etc. While I don’t have to justify my reasons to anyone, I will anyway – in a bit. Before I do that, on my behalf and that of my fellow bloggers, I want to remind everyone who reads ANY blog of ANY type of one very important point:

Bloggers are actual people, NOT machines.

The blogs you (and I) read on crafts, food, politics, parenting, etc., are written by human beings, not computer bots. We have lives, feelings, and commitments outside of our blogs. We have jobs, get sick, have money problems, get married, have surgeries, go on vacations and everything else most folks do in their daily lives. To be held to the expectation of posting like a drone, like some sort of blogging machine that does nothing but write, publish, repeat assembly-line posts is unrealistic and unfair. It’s a lot of pressure for someone to deal with, especially considering most of us do this as a hobby.

Don’t get me wrong: I feel awful for my fans who look forward to new content on PGEW, because I know how frustrating it can be to wait around for new content from your favorite blogs. I feel the same way whenever one of my favorite bloggers takes an extended international trip, or has other things to take care of outside of the blog. In a way, this frustration is flattering – I’ve created something people obviously enjoy and want more of, and it’s amazing to know that the demand continues to grow.

But I urge all of you who are avid blog readers to remember that those DIY tips or recipes or photographs you all look forward to so much – they’re all posted by human beings with lives, jobs, feelings and commitments that don’t always include their blog. Those essays don’t write themselves on their own. The photos don’t get edited by themselves, and those new dishes? They certainly don’t cook themselves (though at times like these when I’m dealing with double-sided shingles and the pain is so intense I can barely breathe, I wish they would). All of these things are done by real people, and like other real people, sometimes bloggers can’t always get around to everything on their To Do list. I have several blogger friends who have had to take time away from their blogs due to the deaths of their parents or spouses, or getting married, or having a baby, etc.

To give you an idea of what’s forced me to shift priorities around so that the blog is not currently #1, here’s a list of the top 3 things I’m dealing with:

  1. I have a chronic pain disorder call Post-herpetic Neuralgia, which comes along with the very unsexy bonus of recurring shingles. Basically, I get shingles every. single. month. And if you’ve ever had the misfortune of having shingles, or know someone who has, you can understand my frustration. If my condition wasn’t already rare enough for someone my age, I’ve now climbed into the super rare category of someone with PHN and recurring shingles – on both sides. You can read more about my condition in this post, but what this boils down to is that I’m in severe pain every day of my life: gut-wrenching, tear-inducing, excruciating nerve pain that exhausts me like nothing else. When I get a shingles outbreak, it’s even worse, as I have to deal with the burning, scalding pain that goes along with that. It’s not always easy for me to get anything done with such severe pain and perpetual fatigue.
  2. I am currently writing my first book. If you’re at all familiar with the process, you know that it is not an easy endeavor, and that it takes a lot of time (especially when you’re self-publishing). And because I want to make sure I’m providing the best content for both the book and the blog, I have had to cut back on post frequency until the book is complete. Most food bloggers who write even regular cookbooks either do not blog at all, or cut back drastically on the frequency of their posts, in order to have the time for book writing. The kind of book I’m writing is part regular book, part cookbook, so this one is even trickier. I did mention earlier in the year that this would have to happen, and for the most part, this was met with understanding and acceptance.
  3. My mother just had surgery for colon cancer last week. Those of you who have been following PGEW for awhile know that I am extremely close to my mom, so the news of the cancer and the anxiety over whether or not a surgery of this magnitude would be safe and successful, has been beyond overwhelming. As we are both of very limited means, trying to find a nurse to care for her post-surgery isn’t really an option for us (and I’d be very worried about putting her in some care facility, after all the horror stories I’ve heard). I’ve been with her since the surgery, spending her entire hospital stay with her, and I’m currently caring for her myself here at my place. It’s been a very difficult time for both of us (esp. since the stress and lack of rest has flared up my own health conditions), but we’re hanging in there. So far, she’s healing well, and to all of you who have sent kind words of support, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Hopefully when we go to Mom’s follow-up appointments, we’ll get the good news that she kicked cancer’s ass.

Needless to say, there’s been a lot going on in my life, things that I feel take priority over my blog. I love my blog, but I love my mother more and I need to take care of her (not to mention my own health) – if folks have a difficult time with that, there’s not much I can do. Am I going to “just give up and admit that [I'm] a failure” as one reader so poetically put it? Nope. That’s not who I am and that’s certainly not the case with my blog or the communities I’ve built through social media. Am I upset that I’ve lost a couple of readers over the past few weeks because they think I am “boring” and that I’ve “lost focus”? Yeah, actually. I don’t agree with them and neither do the majority of my fans and readers, but no blogger likes to lose readers.

But again… that’s not going to make me feel like a “failure” or anything else that some of the more unkind posters have suggested I do. If anything, it will only make me work harder to provide the best content I can. I care about my blog and the community of readers I’ve built over the years, and have a lot I want to do, both with and beyond this blog. And I’m bound and determined to carry that out, despite my roller coaster of a life.

All I ask is that you exercise patience with me and with the other bloggers you follow. Remember that we are not just blog-posting machines, and that our lives sometimes throw us major curve balls, just like everyone’s life does. We bloggers love what we do, and love it even more that you read what we put out there; just remember that there will be times when we have to put our regular lives before our blogging lives. It doesn’t mean we don’t care or that we’ve changed – it just means that we’re being responsible and fair to our jobs, our families, and ourselves.

Robot image courtesy GrottoBlog.com

written by

singer. writer. artist. champagne taste, 2 buck chuck budget. good cook. kooky. chocoholic. patron saint of cats. talker. listener. thinker. sometimes to a fault.

79 Responses to "Time Out: Bloggers are people, not machines"

  1. Beth Peters says:

    Rock on with this post, girl! I had a very popular blog about cystic fibrosis and lung transplant, and now that I’m back to work and “normal life,” I’m not online all day – thank god! I got a lot of similar comments. I have a DISCLAIMER section on my blog that i find humorous, but I even get comments about that.

    Love you, and your blog!

    Beth Peters

  2. Chelsi says:

    I recently started blogging and was shocked by how much work actually goes into coming up with a blog post! I hope things get better for you and that people become more understangin!!!

  3. Maggie says:

    I enjoy what you post, every time you post except this time. Wish people were not so mean to you~~ I have had shingles and now I have neuropathy so I am sorry for your pain and kind of understand what you are going through.

  4. Carol says:

    I rarely give reasons why I’m not posting regularly. I do my blog for myself. If people follow me, that’s wonderful and I reply to every single comment that is left on my blog.

    When other blogs I follow go quiet for awhile, I figure they have a life to live. Plus reading a blog post by a blogger I enjoy is a treat! How dare anyone make you feel badly for not entertaining them?

    This is the first time I’ve posted on your blog – I just wanted to let you know that some of us readers do understand.

  5. Linda Layne says:

    It breaks my heart that you are going thru all this pain and worry. You do not need to contend with these impatient folks who haven’t got a sesame seeds worth of empathy. God bless you!

  6. Melinda says:

    I’m a blogger too and get the same backlash if I don’t post as often as readers expect me too. I totally understand. Ignore them and keep on keeping on! My thoughts are with you and your mom. HUGS!

  7. Joy says:

    I am sorry that you have had to deal with difficult people during a difficult time. Your blog is a treat to me which I enjoy – not one I expect. Take care of yourself & your mom. I have had singles twice but I am sure it has not been as bad as yours – sorry you have to endure the pain that it brings.

  8. annelies says:

    that. is. a. lot. You are going through so much and I know I haven’t been great about reaching out as you’ve been in the thick of it but would want this comment to be a version of a virtual hug. Sending you love right now Kimberly.

  9. Larry Gaian (@BBQGrail) says:

    A big thank you from another human blogger that hasn’t been able to write as much as I used to for a variety of good reason.

    You rock!


  10. Stephanie @ 52 Kitchen Adventures says:

    Wow, I cannot believe people took the time to email you rude comments about your lack of posting. This is not your full time job (if only!) and you do NOT owe them anything. That is just beyond comprehension. You have incredibly legit reasons for not updating (I really hope your mom’s surgery was successful, btw!) but even if you didn’t, that’s your own business. We all have lives and other things going on, and blogging can’t always take a priority. Good luck with everything and stay strong – you’re doing what you can!

  11. Illy Mooncat says:

    Oh. My. Word. People are SAYING stuff like that to you?? That’s awful. I’m quite the fangirl of yours, and whenever you don’t post for a while I go “Drat. Oh well, she must be busy.” People need to get a grip.
    Please send your mama my best wishes. I’ll keep her in my prayers. You as well; I hope you guys can BOTH rest up and feel better soon.
    As for the haters, your life is better without them anyway. Your post was brilliant and I hope everyone who’s been talking crap to you reads it and feels terrible. Serves them right.

  12. Sarah | The Cyclist's Wife says:

    Some people are a-holes but thankfully they don’t make up the majority. Don’t let the a-holes rain on your parade. You have enough to deal with! Jerky people aren’t worth wasting your energy on. Keep up the good work!

  13. Anne B. says:

    Wishing you comfort, strength and a speedy recovery…….

  14. Carly Findlay says:

    Oh gosh you have a lot on your plate (excuse the pun!). You’re doing an amazing job with your blog and your life is full on. How horrible you’re getting abuse – you dont owe readers anything.
    Keep your chin up – and focus on YOU. Don’t let blogging become un-fun.

  15. susan in alaska says:

    It’s lame that you have to post something like this. Some people can be so inconsiderate. Hopefully you know there are many of us that get it, and just wish you and your mom well. Sending more thoughts for speedy recovery, fantastic follow-up appointments, and good health for both of you. Hang in there. :)

  16. Rose says:

    Wow! First of all, my prayers and well wishes to both you and your mother. Secondly, some people just need to get a life. I can’t believe some people get so worked up over lack of post on a blog. I always viewed a blog as someone’s personal journal about a specific topic that they just happened to share with others, at no cost to followers no less. You, my dear, have your priorities in order. Don’t let those insensitive people get you down. Great job.

  17. Lesa says:

    I’m shocked and amazed that people find it acceptable to be angry with you for not posting on your blog. It isn’t as if they are paying you to write the blog for them. I appreciate reading every post and recipe of yours, though honestly because of my own busy life it takes me a while to realize that I haven’t seen recent posts from you.

    My heart goes out to you and your battle against a chronic illness. I hope for the best as your mom recovers from her surgery.

  18. Adey says:

    I just wanted to chime in as a new follower here. I’m really loving what I’ve seen of your blog so far and wish you the best with getting through your current hard times! I’m impressed by your attitude and the entire concept of the blog. I’ve shared your blog with some friends, who also like it, and you even gained a fan who found you after I liked you on FB. She should make up for the mean fans you might have lost LOL.

    Whenever you’re back to blogging regularly, you’ll have some new appreciative followers reading!

  19. Damaris @Kitchen Corners says:

    Continue doing what you’re doing when you can do it. You are so great. Thanks for the work you put in your blog. To tell you the truth I am completely weirded out by bloggers who NEVER take a break. Really?! How?! I’ve been forced to take breaks from my blog and they do me so much good, even though it’s not easy to be away.

    I really hope your mom recovers in full health and that you’ll start feeling better soon.

  20. Doreen says:

    sending you a great big hug – you have so much going on and your priorities are absolutely the right ones for you – I’m so sorry you are getting negative comments/feedback/complaints – on the other side of the coin (not excusing the meanness) it shows that you have a following that really wants to see here your recipes and tips. I hope things calm down soon – that your Mom gets good news and you’re feeling well enough to post some new entries – I have patience and will wait calmly, peacefully and be happy when I see some new content – as that means your top priorities – your health and your Mom’s health are requiring less time … wishing you pain free days ahead – I have a friend whose father has recurring shingles so I have an idea of the pain you are dealing with …
    gentle hugs Kimberly …

  21. Heather in sf says:

    It saddens me you feel the need to justify your blogging frequency change. I too haven’t written much as I’m recovering from surgery and am now back working full time while healing. I can’t imagine the pain and stress you are going through. I hope you and your mom feel better soon.

  22. Yvonne says:

    Hi Kimberly. You must be under a tremendous amount of stress. It is important for you to take care of yourself, for both you and your mom. When I began following you late 2011, I told everyone I knew about you and your PGEW website. Even though I have never met you, please realize you are a very successful young woman with a bright future. Many across the nation know of you and have enjoyed your recipes, including myself. Your mom must be very proud of you. Stay encouraged. I am sure your followers and backers may not realize what you are physically and emotionally going through during this difficult time. – A fan and supporter from Texas.

  23. kristin says:

    oh my goodness. i am so sorry that you felt the need to write this to all your fans! i love your blog, whenever and whatever you post. as a blogger myself, i think there is enough pressure on the self when the gaps between posts get longer, nevermind readers demanding more of you. geesh. please take care of you and know that your post are appreciated, whenever they land on my desktop! ; )

  24. Jess says:

    Wow, I’m a lurker on your blog one of those people that don’t often comment but I just had to comment on this. I cannot believe some people have said such awful things! I really hope you can separate those kinds of comments from the blogging experience because that is just down right nasty. Blogging isn’t a contract and you are totally right we all have lives! More power to you. Take care x

  25. Sam says:

    Hi Kimberly – don’t feel you have to justify your blog. How rude of those people.



  26. Mary says:

    People that are that mean-spirited aren’t even worth worrying about. They are the minority but for whatever reason they get their kicks out of being mean and nasty at any opportunity. I love your blog and your recipes and am looking forward to your book. Take care of yourself and your mother first and know that we’ll be here waiting for you. You are an amazing and strong person – never forget that!

  27. Mara @ What's For Dinner? says:

    I love you.
    That’s all…
    Well, that, and I can’t wait to buy your book :)

  28. the Iowa Expat says:

    I am so sorry that others have made rude comments about the FREE SERVICE you provide to us. I love perusing what you post, when you can, and will continue to follow your feed, no matter how much or little. You have my sympathy regarding the stresses you are experiencing, and I pray that you might experience some relief soon. Looking forward to the book!

  29. ania says:

    Dear Kimberly,

    It surprises me that you have had such communications directed to you. Especially since 1) you have taken the time in the past to go into detail about the daily challenges you face in some delicate parts of your life, and the challenges you face, 2) we all know that you’re writing a book, 3) you have a life I’m surprised.

    I don’t understand why anyone would have to be unkind anyway. If anyone was going through PGEW withdrawals – was it so difficult to send you an email saying, “Hey, Kimberly! I have always enjoyed your blog. I miss your posts. Can you let us know how you’re doing when you have a few minutes?”?

    When people behave inappropriately online, the comic always helps me to get over it a little more quickly than I would otherwise.

    Keep taking care of yourself and your mom.

  30. ania says:

    (^That’s a mess!!)

    Dear Kimberly,

    It surprises me that you have had such communications directed to you. Especially since 1) you have taken the time in the past to go into detail about the daily challenges you face in some delicate parts of your life, 2) we all know that you’re writing a book, 3) you have a life.

    I don’t understand why anyone would have to be unkind anyway. If anyone was going through PGEW withdrawals – was it so difficult to send you an email saying, “Hey, Kimberly! I have always enjoyed your blog. I miss your posts. Can you let us know how you’re doing when you have a few minutes?”?

    When people behave inappropriately online, the Duty Calls comic always helps me to get over it a little more quickly than I would otherwise.

    Keep taking care of yourself and your mom.

  31. Amber says:

    I am also a new reader that stumbled upon your blog recently. These people who have the audacity to email you complaining about your not posting are ridiculous and apparenly have “no life” themselves. When I found you a couple of days ago, I noticed that it had been a while since you posted and that your last posted mentioned you already had a post ready for the next day. I looked for it and didn’t find it. Did I get mad? No. What went through my head was, oh no, I hope everything is ok and nothing has happened. These people have no empathy, and I’m sorry that are downing you. I pray that your mom’s surgery went well, that she will get that great “cancer free” news, and that your flare-ups will lessen each day!

  32. Milla says:

    - Wishing you and your mom a speedy good recovery with lots of rest. My dad recently recovered from colon surgery so I understand where you’re coming from. Again big hugs to you and your mami!
    - I am a ravid fan of your blog and I check it often for new recipe ideas. So I do admit that I get sad when you don’t post food pics, day trip pics or new recipe pic. But I seriously don’t get the anger or hurtful e-mails. You need to take a break! We all do!

  33. Brenda@Coffeeteabooksandme says:

    Wow, how timely! I was just thinking last night that I may need to not post for a few days, even though the weekends are my most “popular” posts due to activities here at home.

    I’m a Type 1 diabetic and deal with fatigue.

    One of my close blog friends has a very popular DIY and decorating blog. She stopped blogging for awhile due to the very same kind of rude comments and e-mails. Her family was dealing with some urgent issues so she wasn’t able to post as much and she had people e-mailing and complaining.

    She just recently started posting once in awhile again. It has taken awhile for the joy of blogging to return.

    As I reminded her (and I need to remind myself), it is HER blog and she is not charging anyone to read it.

  34. Missy says:

    It’s always a sign that you have your priorities in the proper order when the idiots of the world come out of the woodwork with “helpful” comments. Your blog is a beautiful celebration of food but in good times and bad shouldn’t be the MOST important thing. (What the hell are these people thinking) Take care of yourself and your Mom.

    - A fan who day dreams of the dishes you post but won’t starve because you didn’t post a new one!

  35. Sharon says:

    Most of us have real lives, and while we all look forward to our favorite blogs’ latest posts … when they’re updated, that’s great, when they’re not, oh well, move on to the next thing … post when you can … we’ll still look forward to it. For the downer people, well, with all due respect, spend a little of that spare time getting a life.

    Rock on!

  36. Lisa G says:

    I love your blog and would NEVER think to send email and B*$ch at any blogger for not posting. Of course you are people, and as anyone knows, life LOVES to get in the way of our favorite activities. So sorry you had to put up with that. I’ll be praying for you and for your Mom, for recovery and strength and good things to come.

  37. Alicia says:

    My thoughts are with you and your mom… It’s so sad to hear how some readers have been treating you! Keep your chin up and stay strong. You are surrounded by love and support from the majority of your readers.

  38. Sarah R. says:

    I am so sorry that people have been difficult and rude about blogging frequency. That sucks. And you don’t owe them anything. Do what you need to do for you, take care of what you need to take care of, blog when you can and when you want to. Most of us will still be here, happy to read what you have to offer when you have it to offer, with nothing but gratitude. And those who aren’t? Well, frankly, screw ‘em. Take care, and best wishes.

  39. Kacie says:

    People are giving you crap about your posting schedule? GEEZ. That is so ridiculous. I’m sorry about all the stuff you are going through. You don’t need to hear it from people on the internet.

  40. susan says:

    every post is a gift…..something you took the time to sit down and write and share with us. I feel that way about all the blogs I feel. too bad you can’t block the whiners!

  41. michelle says:

    Some people are such dicks. I love how they can feel entitled to something that is completely free and they have done nothing to help create. I say block the trolls, damn the man, and keep on doing what you do!

  42. Kate says:

    Hugs to you. You’re dealing with a lot and you don’t need insensitive people carping on you. Know that strangers love you, love what you write and are hoping for better times ahead for you.

  43. Laine says:

    Please don’t listen to what those few readers have said and I do think they are a small minority. You need to take care of yourself and your family first. I enjoy your posts but would hate to think you were posting because someone told you you had to post. I look forward to your book project being done but if you need to postpone it a few months because you’re helping your mom out that’s what I would do. Take care and best wishes to your mom.

  44. stefka says:

    PGEW, ignore those haters! I enjoy your posts whenever they happen and appreciate how open and honest you are. You’re going through a lot in life, and it takes courage to share that. I’ve never commented before. Just so you know– You probably have LOTS of silent supporters who just don’t comment, so the few people who are meanies may seem like the majority. But it’s not true!

    Thanks for your posts, and I’m excited for your book. Hope your Mom heals quickly and feels better soon. Hang in there :-)

  45. Katie says:

    Ive missed your posts but understand totally! I wish I had known about your Mothers colon cancer sooner. I advise you to go to HACRES.com (Hallelujah Acres) and read the testimonial of the Founder, George Malkumus!! (and all the other testimonials) He watched his mother go through it, got cc himself….then read on to find his CURE! God gave us SELF-HEALING bodies, if we just give it the right fuel! The goal is to strengthen the immune system, not weaken it with chemo/radiation. I also followed this lifestyle back in 99 when I developed a rare tumor in my small intestine. I had it removed but refused the recommended chemo for “precautionary measures”. Instead I strengthened my immune system and never looked back! God bless you and your mother. xoxo

  46. Jennifer Davis says:

    Tell them when they start paying for all your great ideas, then they can bitch. Until then, they should keep their mouth shut.

    This really angered me as I struggle with some ongoing health issues as well so completely understand. And have to say that I LIKE not getting a ton of emails from you. I get them often enough that they keep me interested, but not so much that they just get pesky like others I subscribe to and end up turning off because it can be just too much!

    Keep on keepin on, you’re doing great and we love you!

  47. Patricia Calef says:

    Wow. I cannot believe people would be so insensitive and so nasty. Thank god its only a few, but a few too many. I am so sorry for all your ill health and your Mom’s. Life can be really tough. I’m glad you are here when you can be and wish you and your Mom all the best. I will say a prayer for both of you. You have to not let these people get to you. If anything, feel sorry for them. They obviously do not have a life and are already miserable. They deserve our pity, though not our condonance (is that a word? Well it is now!) of their behavior. Keep up your good work.

  48. Anita Sanz says:

    Kimberly…I am so glad you wrote this post, and so sorry that you had to! I blog weekly, too, but I had no idea bloggers could get such mean backlash for not being able to blog regularly for legitimate reasons. The most important thing is for you to take care of yourself and your family. If you have energy and passion left over to give to the blog/others, then that’s great. And if not, that’s fine. You come first in your life. All my best~Anita

  49. Megs says:

    I have Fibromyalgia so I know what life is like to live in chronic pain. You don’t have to justify anything to anyone regarding your life and why you might not be able to post that often. For one, you are doing this for free because you have a passion that drives you and we are very lucky to get the chance to follow your life. I think that people tend to forget that behind the computer sits a person who is going through very real things and although they may be minute to others, these ordeals are very real to you and affect you on a daily basis. Have your Mom read Foods That Heal, it will give some good tips about what she should eat going through cancer. I also recommend that you look for holistic methods to deal with your disorder, and if I lived closer, I would work on you for free. Just know that you bring joy to so many people and if some are pissed off because you may be working too slow, well than, screw them!! I would rather lose ignorant readers and gain new ones who appreciate that you are very real and are going through very real daily struggles. Never get down over these readers and keep doing what we all have grown to love you for. XOXOXO

  50. Maria White says:

    Send them a bill. $10 per post they’ve read. The sense of entitlement for something you freely share is unfounded.
    We enjoy your blog, thank you for sharing it with us :)

  51. Bev says:

    Hugs to you Kimberly. Bravo to this post though it is a shame that you had to write this explanation. I hope it causes the whiners and complainers intense embarrassment and makes them feel very small, as they most surely are.

    I have been following your blog for several years. I love your recipes, your writing style and how much you share of your self and your life on the blog. I and all your followers here are blessed to have what you so generously share on PGEW.

    Take time to deal with your health issuesl and to care for your mother. Your fans will be here when you are ready to post again.


    Bev Budig

  52. Maria says:

    Kimberly, I am appalled and disgusted by the selfish cruelty some people display when they dont get something they are expecting. Tantrums and imature acting out is expected of two year olds, but grown adults are supposed to know better. I look forward to your posts whenever they arrive. YOU and only you get to determine the frequency of your offering. You never signed a contract stating that you owe anybody anything and people who are so ignorant that they can’t understand a delay, or at least ask questions and get the facts before judging, accusing and attacking are readers you can do without! My prayers go out to both you and your mother for a speedy and complete recovery.
    Hang in there and take extra special care of yourself. You are an amazing, inspiring, talented, gifted writer, and a loving, devoted daughter. May God bless you with health and abundance.

  53. Kay Johnson says:

    Oh Sister Blogger, I hear you! As a blogger myself, I’ve experienced the same nastiness as you have. I choose to speak up and vent my frustrations with such selfish people as well. I agree, we are not machine and each post takes a huge amount of time to complete. Something those ‘want it now’ types of people would never understand. I hope you and your Mother’s health improve soon. I await your next post … when ever you are able to! And good luck on the new book too!!

  54. Foodforthoughtlinds says:

    You go girl!! As a blogger myself, I also strive to provide regular content to my readers. But, at the same time, I’m not going to devote my entire life to it. There are most definitely other things that take priority to blogging. And sometimes, it is just sitting down to sit a nice quiet tea. No justification needed!

  55. Tam says:


    You might try this for your shingles.


    Please check out as many references as you can to make a decision whether to use it or not. I belong to a Yahoo group that is dedicated to the use of natural herbs, oils, and the like. I haven’t had shingles, but someone in the group suggested tamanu or foraha oil with ravensara essential oil in it to help relieve it. Like I said, I haven’t had it, but a friend did. She said it was just horrible. I hate to hear anyone having to go through that. I hope it helps you.

  56. bevy says:

    well… i’m very sorry people are being rude. i call those kinda posts “internet balls”. these folks probably wouldn’t have the balls to confront you in person. and that shows their intelligence. it’s sad indeed to have someone try to bully you for not posting on your FREE blog site. go figure.

    i am so sorry you are ill. and i pray your mother recovers, nicely. i suffer from chronic illesses and 4 auto immune diseases. some days i feel like i’ve done an amazing thing to get up and get dressed. i feel ya. try not to let it bother you. i would be tempted to block rude people so that they can’t read the blog or comment. but that’s me.

    wishing you and your mother better health and no pain. may the lord bless and keep you.

  57. Kelli says:

    So, where’s the recipe? :-)
    I just found you, Poor Girl, and I’m so happy I did. For a few weeks now I have planned my weekly meals with your recipes to great success with my husband (who is not a picky eater, but not a foodie either), and my 20 month old daughter (who is a bit of a foodie, and a little picky). When I made your “Mushroom & Leek Pizza”, my husband was surprised to find out it was home made. He thought it was one of those “fancy pizzas” I sometimes get from Trader Joe’s. I brought your bean salad with honey cumin vinegrette (sorry, terrible speller) to share at work and it was G O N E in a flash.
    Thank you for your hard work in spite of all of your difficulties and I wish you and your Mom well.
    And to those people complaining, have you seen all the recipes in Poor Girl’s archives? What, you can’t make a recipe twice?

  58. Jill says:

    Read all of these above and take heart. I wish you and your Mom much better health, of course, but even if your life was all roses and puppies and unicorns all the time, remember that you don’t owe the cyber world ANYTHING, you give to us freely and if some don’t accept with grace well…well… they are just stoopid poopy heads!
    Look after yourself and your loved ones first, we strangers on the Internet can learn a little patience.
    Sending green light and the image of crossed digits.

  59. moonsword says:

    If it helps at all, I just discovered your blog today and I love it and will definitely return. So you’ve gained a new reader even it you have lost a few silly souls. I’ll pass this on to my blogger friends too so you may gain some more fans!
    Best wishes to you and your mom and speedy recovery for you both! Go easy on yourself and breathe once in awhile. :)

  60. Bigyaz says:

    Ignore the idiot haters who somehow think you owe them something. Not worth wasting a second on them.

  61. Tasha says:

    Please continue to post as much or as little as you want too. You have given so much to your readers. I REALLY appriecate you taking the time out to share with us your passion for cooking healthy, creative and budget friendly meals. I love your recipes and have tried a few. I can’t wait until your cookbook comes out. THANKS for all you do, I will be praying for you and your mom. THANKS again, again, & again!

  62. Dana says:

    Amen to that!

    I’m happy to hear your mum is recovering, and hoping as well that she kicks cancer’s ass. Cancer needs it’s ass kicked more often.

    Always happy to see a post!

  63. Sam says:

    I am totally floored that (based on the comments) it’s regular practice for blog readers to send nasty emails and comments. How on EARTH these people think that’s OK is totally insane. Don’t pay them a second thought! I read a LOT of blogs and never once considered the writers to be failures, delinquents or losers for not posting the stuff I love. If I don’t love it, I just unsubscribe. It’s none of my business what they write or don’t write. I just follow, or not. That’s all the say I get. To all the horrible people giving you grief: You don’t like it, don’t read it. What you do or don’t do is not something they get a say in. The way you run your life is none of their business. Regardless if you have extenuating circumstances in your life right now. YOU run YOUR life and YOUR blog how YOU want and more power to you for doing it at all!!

  64. April says:

    I think what some people fail to realize is that most of us don’t get paid for blogging. I wish…I like this more than my actual job most days!

    I’m impressed with how many posts you have managed in spite of all of your personal turmoil. I always look forward to the new ones, but life has to come first! Hope you and your mom are both feeling better soon. Keep up the good work and for those who don’t like it, keep giving ‘em hell!

  65. Ive Cartier says:

    I can’t speak for everyone else, but I know I always feel lucky that bloggers take time out of their busy life to actually bring joy in to my life, me a stranger. I’m sure I’m not the only one to think this way. Just as I’m sure that, even though their negative comments stand out much more, the SOBs are an insignificant minority.

    I admire you greatly. I’ve had chronic back pain for 2 years now and it has basically put my life on hold. I can’t imagine how much precious energy goes into your blog, your book and now making sure your mom gets better. Please, take a break. You make the rest of us lazy bastards look bad ;-)

    Be sure I’ll be checking in regularly to see if you’re back on. You won’t be losing this reader. :-)

  66. karen says:

    wishing you health and peace~~thanks for the great post:)

  67. Cindy says:

    Just wanted to affirm that you have a WONDERFUL blog, one which I have recommended to many friends. You are a unique and special person…..never forget that. Do what you need to stay healthy. When you do post, it is a special surprise in my day!

  68. xpurg8d says:

    I’d like to suggest that anyone who gets so worked up over a change in the posting schedule for a food blog (although yours is delightfully much more than “a food blog”) is a Class A Failure. To take the time to write mean e-mails to a person you presumably like to read is just astonishing.

    When I check in to PGEW and see that you haven’t put up anything new, my first reaction is, “I hope she’s just busy, and not sick again.” That’s what any normal person does when they follow a blogger and know that health issues are prominent in the writer’s life. Ditch the trolls who enjoy bullying and stay focused on all the rest of us who appreciate what you do and are fine with waiting till you’re able to do it.

    Best wishes to you and your mom for a speedy recovery and better health soon.

  69. Renee says:

    People are idiots. People online are idiots at no peril to themselves. Look at it this way– if you charged your readers for every post at the same pace, the same idiots would be complaining you post too often!

    Ignore them as much as you can and write for yourself and people who enjoy what you write. I wish you well.and enjoy what you do write. I know it is a gift you are offering and am happy to receive it.

  70. Ally says:

    Sure I miss your posts, but LIFE happens, not to mention anyone who follows you hopefully showed gratitude by helping get your book started, so we ALL know you are busy with that huge project, let alone the fact that once again, life happens. Don’t sweat the haters. You take care of yourself and your momma. I hadn’t realize the ridiculously selfish entitlement movement had reached blog-readers. Know that we all are rooting for you, and have actual compassion and understanding that there are only 24 hrs in each day and that gee, pain makes you not want to do anything. Hope you and your momma are on your way to better days, if not full recovery. XOXO

  71. Lynn says:

    I just started following your blog today so this is the first blog post I have read (well, except for the recipe that brought me to your blog in the first place) Frankly, such a response to not having regular posts is astonishing. You are providing a wonderful service to people who don’t pay a dime but just enjoy your ideas, thoughts and recipes. Why should anyone get upset if you can’t post every day? They’re the ones who need a life! You take care of yourself and I look forward to reading future posts when you get around to them…no hurry, no worry!

  72. Kris says:

    I’m frankly shocked that anyone would have the nerve to send something like that to a blogger. Thinking of you and your mom and praying for you during this difficult time. And GO YOU on the book! I’ll be purchasing a copy when it comes out.

  73. Sherry Bailey says:

    Glad to see you are getting lots of support, which, I hope helps a little. What YOU did wrong is be so GOOD at your blog! Those insensitive clods rely on you now, and are too stupid to not understand that it’s NOT all about them! One blogger I know has subs — maybe you could find another pal who can do minor updates, “holding pattern” posts at your suggestion or direction or whatever to kind of continue to say “hi, I’m still here” without actually having to do that yourself. (Or not, of course — it’s your blog and life, but it’s just a thought…)

    I had shingles, mine was “mild case”. but even so it was one of the worst experiences of my life. So what YOU are going through is beyond my comprehension. Seriously. I wish you the best and hope some medical miracle gets everything under control for you.

  74. Alicia says:

    Wow about those people emailing you. I’m just shocked at the behavior of these people. They just aren’t worth worrying about since they obviously are rude and nasty and have manners to behave as they did. Ignore them since you’re doing us a favour by writing your blog especially given what’s happening in your life to you and to your Mom. As you can see you’ve got lots of people rooting for you and your Mom. Good luck with your writing and I hope that you and your Mom have some better days soon and that your Mom has a full recovery. Just don’t worry about the blog….take care of yourself and your Mom.

  75. Julie says:

    Thank you for posting this. I had no idea that anyone would be nervy enough to complain to you in this way. Talk about people with a sense of entitlement! I will enjoy your posts whenever you post them and count myself lucky to have the gift of your expertise and good humor. Take care of yourself!

  76. kris says:

    Oh, honey. Ignore the trolls. Let them go back under their bridges and don’t give them another thought.

    I can’t imagine the stress you’re under right now. I have some experience with watching a beloved mom go through cancer–unless someone has truly been through that, they can’t understand. Just like I can only imagine the stress of a chronic illness such as yours. Yet you choose to do such positive things with your life–that alone gives me hope that I can get through my own trials and tribulations.

    I’m a regular reader (loved the strawberry quinoa muffins!), and I am very much looking forward to your book! Hang in there, do what you need to do, and look at all the supportive comments received here whenever you have a troll trying to nip at you.

  77. John says:

    I will admit I wonder where my new content is when my favourite bloggers don’t post but I usually don’t curse them out or call them a loser! I remind myself like you said they have lives too and we must be patient. After what you told everyone hear of your situation people better back up off your a**! :)

    P.S: Can’t remember where I came across your blog this past week but I’m going to start trying your recipes. I’ve been looking for different inexpensive meals and I like what I’ve seen here so far.

  78. Betsy says:

    Good Grief! (to quote Charlie Brown) What is the matter with people who are getting your blog with fabulous recipes, ideas, and tips that are free to read? I’m relatively new to your blog, but I’ve been so impressed with the quality of your photos, recipes, and tips for shopping!

    I work for an internet only store and have listened as the owner handles these critics. I’m sorry they have hit you, too!

    For those of us whose wallets are much skinnier than they once were, it is so encouraging to read your tips and remember that we can cook healthy meals on a budget.

    Thank you for the blog. Best wishes to your mother for a speedy recovery and to you for patience as you nurse her through these days.

  79. Seante Wilson says:

    This is part of the reason why I didn’t start a blog..You are an amazing strong person and I admire you with all that you are going through that you manage this blog as well.
    Thing that people have to understand is that there’s a lot of recipes on here and if there’s no other posts because you do have a life outside of here, why cant they just surf around for something they haven’t tried from this blog?

    I hope that you get better soon and I hope that alls well with your mom.
    I say take all the time you need…we will be here :)
    And for the ones that were rude and mean? Well its unfortunate for them because they are missing out!


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